19 thoughts I had while watching Hot Fuzz for the first time

Hot Fuzz is the second film of the Three Flavours Cornetto trilogy by director Edgar Wright and stars Simon Pegg and Nick Frost. Each film parodies other films within its designated genre. This time around, Hot Fuzz pokes fun at action and buddy cop films. Though the film is categorized as a comedy, I personally believe that the script and cast play it off so seriously, which is why I would consider it an action movie with comedic moments. 

  1. This police station is really nice compared to the ones in the US
  2. As expected, Wright uses a montage to card stack Angle’s qualifications
  3. Peter Jackson, Martin Freeman, Steve Coogan, Cate Blanchett cameos
  4. Once again Edgar Wright proves he’s the king of visual comedy 
  5. When you arrest your boss’s son
  6. I like how the town’s biggest issues are swans and a street performer 
  7. Pegg and Frost are gold 
  8. Why is it every time I see someone in a black cloak I think of a cult?
  9. The English countryside and the Midwest are more similar than you think
  10. How do you get a naval mine?
  11. Now that’s a movie collection!
  12. No human can actually break a concrete church spire
  13. So I guess the Neighbourhood Watch is a cult now
  14. They killed them because they lost the Village of the Year award
  15. Where did he get a horse?
  16. Wouldn’t it be easier to just call the London police instead of just killing the whole watch himself?
  17. Hot Fuzz is clearly satirizing cops films, but I need more substance than car chases and gunfights
  18. Dead by castle life-size model
  19. I like how they just have that mine laying around for someone to trip over

To be honest, Hot Fuzz is my least favorite of the Cornetto trilogy with Shaun of the Dead being the best. I found some of the jokes fall flat, and after a while, I got tired of seeing the whole police force believing the murders were just accidents. It does pick up about 20 minutes into it after the first two people are killed. After watching this, I’m probably going to rewatch Shaun and At World’s End, but this does get me excited for Wright’s new film Baby Driver.

March Favorites

Just when you think it’s spring, mother nature continues to give you winter weather. Surprisingly, this month wasn’t as busy as I expected which has allowed me to go out and find new things.

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California Map Scarf- Old Navy

http://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=507936022&vid=1&locale=en_US&kwid=1&sem=false&sdkw=printed-linear-scarf-P507936&brandCvoSid=Z2SCCJFPAD23&sdReferer=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.oldnavy.com%2Fproducts%2Fwomens-scarves.jsp

Hands down my favorite store is Old Navy, but recently they only restock new clothes like every three months. On a limb, I ran in there and found a few new pieces for spring. Though paired with the right outfit it’s cute, this scarf works better as a tapestry.

 

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Lemon Bag- Forever 21

http://www.forever21.com/Product/Product.aspxbr=F21&category=ACC&productid=1000056077
I actually bought this bag to save back for the summer, but I couldn’t resist using it right now. It’s clearly inspired by the infamous grapefruit bag that all of the beauty YouTubers had a few years ago. For the price, the bag is really well made and the vinyl outside is easy to wipe off.


Logan

One of my goals of 2017 was to go see more movies in theaters. I’m kind of proud of myself because I’ve seen at least one new movie each week this past month. Logan is a masterpiece that I hope will rejuvenate the X-Men franchise. The series has been using Wolverine as their safeguard for years and have been shoehorning him into every film. This isn’t a fun film to watch at all, but I would be lying if I said I didn’t shed a tear at the end.


Riverdale

Based on the Archie comics, Riverdale has quickly become my guilty pleasure. The first season is similar to other CW shows of the past, as it follows a group of teens during their day to day lives in a small town. The show pulls viewers in with its constant plot twists and a murder mystery storyline.

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Stacked iPhone Case

https://www.amazon.com/iPhone-Stack-Pack-Black-Removeable/dp/B018VK9IOO

My phone is always dead. Sure, I could carry around my charger and portable chargers, but they take up too much space in my bag. This case includes a battery pack that attaches to it and comes with a charging base that makes my phone charge wirelessly. Originally I bought this case from Forever 21, but my mom ended up falling in love with it and took it. So I reordered another case for myself from Amazon.

 

Kong: Skull Island Is Actually An Anti-War Film

Somehow I was dragged into seeing Kong: Skull Island last weekend, and I’ve got to say it’s pretty good. I was expecting to see a basic explosion-filled action blockbuster, but unlike its predecessor, Kong is actually an anti-war film.

Based off of the end credit scene, it’s confirmed that Kong takes place in the same universe as 2014’s Godzilla. Personally, I didn’t enjoy Godzilla and kind of forgot about it. Both the acting and use of action was bland, and the little plot it did have was just the military chasing down Godzilla.

Kong takes place sometime after Paris Peace Accords were signed in 1973. The US government is leading an expedition to an unknown island called Skull Island, although it’s later revealed to be a government plot to get rid of these ancient monsters.

In order to reach the island, the expedition requires a helicopter squadron to escort them. This is when we first meet Lieutenant Colonel Preston Packard (Samuel L Jackson) and the Sky Devils. Before they head out, we get a brief scene that takes place on a military base, where the drafted soldiers are sitting around and chatting about their plans when they return home. This scene is added to humanize the men, as later they are the ones who are out to kill Kong.

Other members of the group are Bill Randa (Tom Hiddleston) and Mason Weaver (Brie Larson). Randa was contracted by the government to guide the group in the uncharted jungle. Weaver is a pacifist photographer whose plan is to expose whatever is on the island; she believes the island is a secret government base.

The anti-war themes start when Packard stops Weaver at the dock before their departure. Packard explains that people like Weaver were why the military didn’t have public support while in Vietnam. She replies that if the military did their job, they wouldn’t have lost the war. He then said,

“We didn’t lose the war. We abandoned it.”

Before landing on the island, they drop explosives on the ground to determine if the island is hollow on the inside. This can represent the Napalm bombs that were dropped on Vietnam and Korea. In the film, they are what draw out Kong and the skull crawler.

Later on, the group meets Hank Marlow (John C. Reilly), a man who crashed on the island during WW2 with a Japanese soldier. The two put aside their differences in order to survive and later become best friends. Marlow asks the group what he missed in the last 20+ years.

Marlow: “Who’s winning the war?”

Conrad: “Which one?”

Marlow: “…That makes sense, I guess.”

Most believed that WW2 was supposed to be the war to end all wars, but little did they know it was just the beginning.

Another scene shows a soldier carrying a Vietnamese gun instead of his military issued one. When asked about it, he states that he believes that the farmer he took it from probably had never seen a gun before the Americans came. This makes you wonder if some enemies don’t really exist until you create them. Some see the Americans entering the war to stop communism, but not the North Vietnamese.

Director Jordan Vogt-Roberts found influence for the film in other Vietnam era based films such as Platoon, Apocalypse Now, and Full Metal Jacket. The film used a warm color pallet for the action scenes, while scenes that displayed calmness switched to a cooler pallet. This is all topped off with a fantastic soundtrack filled with Vietnam era songs from Creedence Clearwater Revival, Black Sabbath, and David Bowie. (I made a playlist below)

 

 

 

Thoughts on Yoga Hosers

Have you ever seen a movie so bad that you had to tell everyone about it? For me, that would be Yoga Hosers – the 2016 “attempt” at making a teen action comedy by Kevin Smith. Over the holiday break, I watched this movie for the first time. It must have been VERY late at night, because the only thing I remember about it was that it was terrible. Yoga Hosers is the textbook definition of nepotism, as Smith cast his daughter, Harley Quinn Smith, and her best friend, Lily Rose Depp, as the two leads. This movie is like driving past a car crash because you just can’t look away.

  1. Do you think Kevin Smith wrote all of the songs in this movie?
  2. I don’t think that many people would want to come to a mini-mart within a span of ten minutes.
  3. When will Austin Butler stop being cast as a teenager?
  4. These people’s Canadian accents are almost worse than their acting.
  5. Why would anyone trust a guy named Yogi to teach you yoga?
  6. Don’t you hate it when you have to pause a movie just to read the title cards?
  7. Where did the idea for this movie even come from? Smith says the idea for Tusk and Yoga Hosers came to him during a podcast. I think he has a deep-seeded hatred for Canada.
  8. Harley Quinn and Lily Rose aren’t too bad singers, but they keep making awkward eye contact with the camera.
  9. Wiener dogs aren’t evil.
  10. Movies like this give millennials a bad name.
  11. Much like Yogi Bear, I don’t think Kevin Smith understands how copyrights work.
  12. Ladies and gentlemen, this is why you always bring a weapon.
  13. These special effects are borderline Syfy Channel level of bad.
  14. STAN LEE CAMEO
  15. When one of your villains is a foot tall Nazi sausage, I expect to have more sausage jokes.
  16. Yoga isn’t going to help you here.
  17. Why is the Bratzi’s insides bright orange?
  18. As an American, I have no clue how the Canadian justice system works. This is a complete guess, but I don’t think that they have suspects share the same police interrogation room.
  19. If I had a secret lab, I probably would put it in the bathroom too.
  20. This guy’s accents are very bad – like an annoying theater kid trying to do a British accent level of bad.
  21. After reading some reviews, I’m surprised that no one brought up how Yoga Hosers blatantly ripped off countless other movies.

 

In many ways, this was just a remake of Smith’s cult classic film Clerks. The only difference was that this time, it was teenage girls in Canada with Nazis. One thing I truly liked about the film was the graphics, but that was about it. Like with most Kevin Smith films, it seemed like the film was just one big inside joke that no one understood. I get that artists should take risks, but most of Smith’s career has been a risk that has had no payoff.

As I start to enter adulthood, I’m starting to realize that these kinds of movies aren’t designed for me. This was made for pre-teen girls, and I know that I probably would have loved it seven years ago. That doesn’t give it a pass though, because the plot was still trash. Leads Harley Quinn Smith and Lily Rose Depp weren’t terrible in their roles and had chemistry, but their acting still felt kind of stiff in front of the camera. Kevin Smith has both directing and writing talent, but he needs to start making content that isn’t just for his small fan base. I think Smith needs to work on projects that he doesn’t have full control on. When someone has too much power, things always fall apart. Currently, Smith has been killing it on the CW. He directed my favorite episode of The Flash, “The Runaway Dinosaur”. Smith is currently working on the final film in the True North Trilogy, with the kind-of-sequel to Tusk and Yoga Hoser called Moose Jaws.

What does “The Last Jedi” Mean?

On Monday, January 23rd, Disney and Lucasfilm announced that Star Wars: Episode VIII would be called The Last Jedi. Since last December when The Force Awakens was released, fans have been theorizing what the next installment would look like. I believe this title gives a lot more than expected.

Starting off, we currently know that there’s four confirmed living force sensitive people in the Galaxy: Rey, Kylo Ren (Ben Solo), Supreme Leader Snoke, and Luke Skywalker. Both Kylo and Snoke work for the First Order and would be considered Sith, not Jedi. That leaves us with Luke and Rey. I honestly don’t think this title is talking about Rey because Episode VII’s title, The Force Awakens, referred to her finding the force. It doesn’t make sense to have two movies back to back referencing Rey in the title.

Luke is the last Jedi to be trained by the last “true” Jedi Master, Yoda. Episode VIII is supposed to start where VII ended, and Rey is nowhere close to becoming a Jedi. The ghost voice of Obi-Wan Kenobi even tells Rey when she picks up Luke’s original lightsaber that “these are your first steps.” I have no doubt that by the end of this trilogy Rey will have become a full Jedi, but as of now she is just Luke’s new apprentice. Plus, in the opening crawl of The Force Awakens, it even refers to Luke as “The Last Jedi.”

“Luke Skywalker has vanished. In his absence, the sinister FIRST ORDER has risen from the ashes of the Empire and will not rest until Skywalker, the last Jedi, has been destroyed.”

– The Force Awakens Opening Crawl

From an official statement from Disney & Lucasfilm, it was said that The Last Jedi will be the next chapter in the Skywalker Saga. This had me thinking that Rey might turn out to be Luke’s daughter, but I think if they went that route it would be a letdown.

The new red logo also tells us a lot about the movie. Red signifies danger, and in the Star Wars franchise it is the color for the Sith. Maybe we will get some flashbacks of the two training before Kylo went full emo. This color was used in both Return of the Jedi and Revenge of the Sith. Both of these films were the darkest of their trilogies and both featured major deaths.

The question is… who is going to die? My theory is Luke. This will pass the torch on to Rey, and then she will become “The Last Jedi.” I feel like his death will be in the last scene of the film, and it will be the “Luke, I am your father” moment that we got in Empire. At the same time, I don’t think they will kill anyone because they just killed off Han.

Now that we have the title, I would expect to have a teaser trailer within the next two months. You never know… they might even drop it next week during the Super Bowl.

22 Thoughts I Had While Watching The Flash: The Present

My name is Gracie Tolley, and I am the laziest woman alive. It’s because I avoid all responsibilities during the week in order to watch the CW’s DC shows. If I had to rank them, The Flash and Legends would be tied for first due to them always testing out new waters and how they feature characters that are just as complex as their storylines. Though I still watch Arrow, I really haven’t enjoyed it since season three. In my opinion, the show takes itself too seriously and has entered a pit of despair that they can’t return from. On the other hand, Supergirl is too cheery and optimistic at times, but at least it’s fun. In honor of The Flash’s midseason finale, I thought I would give my thoughts on season 3 episode 7: The Present.

  1. Ever since we first met Julian, I could’ve told you he was going to be the villain.
  2. I honestly love holiday episodes. Christmas always brings out the best in characters.
  3. The Philosopher’s Stone? Don’t you mean the Sorcerer’s Stone?
  4. The Flash’s set designers/decorators deserve a raise; they are phenomenal.
  5. Meanwhile on Earth Three.. Luke Skywalker robs a bank.
  6. How does that hat stay on his head? It doesn’t have a chinstrap or anything.
  7. I know Earth Three is super old-timey, but why use a Tommy gun?
  8. The fact that they can get Mark Hamill on the show deserves a round of applause.  
  9. Savitar looks like a poor man’s transformer meets Sauron.
  10. H.R.’s hat is distracting me right now.
  11. Alchemy seems like he thoroughly enjoys steampunk.
  12. That battle between Savitar and Jay looks like garbage. This is the holiday season though so all is forgiven.
  13. JUST LET WALLY BE KID FLASH ALREADY!!
  14. Barry really isn’t good at this whole secret identity thing.
  15. Cisco, you know this is a trap. Really? You’re that dumb?
  16. Maybe he knows all of you because you guys never shut up and tell everyone your secrets.
  17. What’s up with the drumsticks?
  18. Just throw the box in a volcano.
  19. If this ends up like Young Justice season 2, I’m done.
  20. Like Barry isn’t just going to time travel the shit out of this to save Iris.
  21. PLEASE BE A SUIT! PLEASE BE A SUIT!
  22. Life is whole again.

The Present was another great episode from team Flash. This midseason finale set up the second half of the season. Expect to see a lot of Barry worrying about the future and the team fussing over Wally being Kid Flash. By the time I post this tonight, I will have already seen today’s episode of Arrow (What We Leave Behind). For my opinion on that, check me out on twitter @GToIIey.

14 thoughts I had while watching The Nightmare before Christmas for the first time

There is only two things I’m certain of about the emo community: their love and compassion towards Hot Topic’s semi-annual sale and Jack Skellington. In preparation for Halloween, I thought I should watch The Nightmare before Christmas for the first time.

  1. Jack might be the pumpkin king, but we all know Tim Burton is the emo king.
  2. Maybe it’s just me, but every stop motion movie I’ve ever watched has creeped me out.
  3. Insert unnecessary music number.
  4. I’m totally lost.
  5. Is this a musical? **Googles** This is going to be a long hour and a half.
  6. Jack is a glorified party planner.
  7. Currently at the 16-minute mark, and I still don’t know what the plot is.
  8. You’ve got a whole year before Halloween rolls around again – chill out, bro.
  9. I know how to explain Christmas to everybody. Another song!
  10. Why do they need to kidnap Santa?
  11. Jack is kind of a dick.
  12. Don’t worry, he’s not dead. He’s the main character.
  13. Is this a Christmas or Halloween movie?
  14. Why is everyone white in Tim Burton movies?

Sorry this week’s post was so short.. Nightmare wasn’t really my cup of tea, although I do respect the time and effort Tim Burton and his team took to make it. Where it lost me was in its plot or even the lack of plot itself. Also, I’m not a huge fan of musicals. (Especially ones that don’t feature Meryl Streep.) Don’t worry, I will make it up to you next week!

36 thoughts I had while watching Escape from L.A. for the first time

As I go back into the hustle and bustle of the school year, I’m going to try to not procrastinate on my posts for my editor’s and my own sake. I really enjoyed doing my June story, 35 thoughts I had while watching the Princess Bride for the first time, and so I’m here to do it again with Escape from L.A. It’s a lot more fun than some other post, and I actually might try to do this once a month.

  1. John Carpenter directed this? This is going to be messed up. Let’s hope in a good way.
  2. Narration by Jamie Lee Curtis.
  3. Is this presidential candidate named Al Gore?
  4. Who would want to be president for the rest of their life?
  5. Did Batman: Arkham City steal this plot?
  6. If the CGI was any worse, this would be a Syfy channel original movie.
  7. That’s kind of a small wall for a maximum security prison.
  8. Why would he water his plants during a time like this?
  9. Who names their kid Snake?
  10. Electric chair or L.A.? I would pick the chair.
  11. Kurt Russell used to be a babe.
  12. How does a 20-something-year-old hijack Air Force One?
  13. Damn millennial and their video games..
  14. Wow! So many movies nowadays have ripped this off. Or did this rip off other movies that came out before it?
  15. The CGI is bad. Batman and Robin is better. It still triumphs over Spy Kids though.
  16. When you have worse effects than Sharkboy and Lavagirl, you have an issue. You might argue that it was the 90’s and that they didn’t start getting good until ten years age, but two words: Jurassic Park.
  17. How do they still have gas and bullets?
  18. STEVE BUSCEMI!
  19. I’ve never seen a net launcher, but I don’t think they work like that.
  20. How does everyone know his name?
  21. Unnecessary love interest.
  22. Steve Buscemi ex machina.
  23. 666 is their password.
  24. Snake is better at basketball than most of the Lakers.
  25. I’ve never been to L.A. or the east coast. Do they experience aftershock this much?
  26. What’s up with this music?
  27. NO SURFING IN ACTION FLICKS!
  28. Shouldn’t he be foaming at the mouth by now?
  29. Jackie Brown!
  30. Who carries red nail polish on them?
  31. Don’t waste your bullets.
  32. When did he get his jacket back?
  33. No red meat! Well, I’m screwed.
  34. Why would you want to shut down the whole planet? That’s a dick move.
  35. Happy Hunger Games!
  36. This is a sequel? Guess I need to do my research prior to watching next time.

 

35 thoughts I had while watching The Princess Bride for the first time

Everyone tells me that The Princess Bride is one of those movies you have to watch before you die. I’m not really a fantasy movie fan, but I have been putting it off for too long.

  1. This screams 1987.
  2. Is this based on a book?
  3. Were there pirates in the Renaissance?
  4. Buttercup reminds me of Bella from Twilight for some reason.
  5. Is that Lord Farquaad?
  6. Never trust men you find in the woods.
  7. I guess she had that coming.
  8. So they took her to start a war?
  9. Who fishes at night?
  10. That’s a big eel.
  11. Who climbs a rope like that?
  12. Is it supposed to be a surprise that Westley is the guy in black?
  13. If you’re going to kill someone, kill them.
  14. Why would you use your left hand if you’re right handed?
  15. How would Vizzini know that Westley knocked out Inigo?
  16. Why is she blindfolded?
  17. Are there criminals in Australia?
  18. If I was him I would have put poison in both cups.
  19. Wow, I was right! That never happens.
  20. Did he jump onto that horse?
  21. Why doesn’t Westley tell Buttercup that he’s alive?  
  22. Which set did they reuse? The Bog of Eternal Stench or Dagobah?
  23. Stop, drop, and roll!
  24. His arm healed fast.
  25. That crown seems too large for her head.
  26. Plan a party, murder your wife, and frame someone for a crime. #firstworldproblems
  27. Wouldn’t it be easier to stab him?
  28. Why would Buttercup trust him for a second?
  29. Billy Crystal ex machina?
  30. Worst guards ever.
  31. This better not end like Romeo and Juliet.
  32. How did she not notice that he was on the bed?
  33. Did he kill the six fingered man?
  34. Couldn’t they have just walked down the stairs?
  35. That’s 98 minutes I will never get back.